"ALMOST one in three dismissed denying a partner money as a form of abuse".

And they want our schools to "educte" males that men abuse women.

God help us, and the children who loose their fathers becuase of this.

Insult to women's injuries

Karen Collier

October 27, 2006 12:00am

A DISTURBING number of Victorians make excuses for rapists and wife beaters, a study has found.

Almost two in five people believe the myth that men attack women because they can't suppress sexual urges, a VicHealth report reveals.

Almost one in four are willing to forgive domestic violence if men lose control or express regret.

The results have sparked calls for secondary school lessons on preventing sexual assault.

The survey coincides with disgust over a group of young thugs who filmed themselves degrading and abusing a teenage girl.

It also follows outrage at comments from Australia's top Muslim cleric, Sheik Taj el-Din al-Hilaly, comparing women without hijabs with dumped meat inviting prey.

VicHealth chief Rob Moodie said although attitudes had improved in the past decade, and almost all surveyed viewed domestic violence and forced sex as a crime, damaging opinions remained.

"The vast majority don't condone violence against women but there is still a distressingly high number who excuse it and believe some of the myths around it," Dr Moodie said.

Men and those born overseas were more likely to blame victims and trivialise, deny or justify violence, he said, but culture could not be used to excuse such behaviour.

The Two steps forward, one step back report, to be released today, found:

ALMOST half thought women made up violence claims to gain an upper hand in custody disputes.

ALMOST one in four felt that women falsified rape claims.

ALMOST one in six believed women often say no to sex when they mean yes.

ONE in five thought men and women were equally guilty of domestic violence, despite the overwhelming number of victims being women.

ALMOST one in three dismissed denying a partner money as a form of abuse.

ALMOST one in four did not believe yelling abuse at a partner was serious.

CASA (Centre Against Sexual Assault) House manager Helen Makregiorgos said all secondary students should be taught about respectful relationships and consent to help combat violence.

Ms Makregiorgos also called for tighter curbs on advertising portraying women as sex objects.

The findings, based on a phone survey of 2800 Victorians, come before White Ribbon Day on November 25, a campaign urging men to condemn violence against women.

Dr Moodie said tackling discrimination would help challenge attitudes.

Family violence is the leading preventable cause of death, disability and illness in women aged 15-44.

It costs the nation $8 billion a year in health and other expenses.

Net link: www.vichealth.vic.gov.au

--
Kind regards
Simon

Friday, October 13, 2006

Giving children a voice takes conflict out of divorce

Amazing how dumb these "experts' are.
But why expose the kids to manipulation and fear.

Can you imaging how much pressure your little girl for instance is put under to support her mother.
Can you imaging the pressure that's brought to bear by phycologists brought in to treat the child's behaviour with the mother after daddy been removed from her life.
Sure most kids are going to want fairness ... and both their parents in their lives.
Wouldn't it be easier to make the exclusion of one parent by the other illegal?
and not to bring the kids in to demonstrate this simple truth.

Regards,Simon
vascopajama@dodo.com.au



On 12/10/06, gcpg wrote:

http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,20867,20563011-2702,00.html

Giving children a voice takes conflict out of divorce
Caroline Overington
October 11, 2006

DIVORCING parents often try to keep the children out of the conflict. New research shows it may be the worst thing they can do.

A report by child psychologist Jenn McIntosh shows that when children are included in the debate about a collapsing marriage, the outcome is better for both parents, especially fathers, and for the children.

Divorcing parents who were presented with evidence of the effect of their squabbling on their children - in the form of their child's writing or drawings - were less likely to end up in the Family Court, and their post-separation parenting plans became more durable.

"We suspected that children would benefit if they were being heard," Dr McIntosh said. "But the fact that fathers gained so much from the experience - we didn't expect that."

More than 140 families with 364 children participated in the study, funded by the Attorney-General's Department for the Australian Institute of Family Studies' October seminar.

Attorney-General Philip Ruddock was behind this year's changes to family law, which require separating parents to at least attempt to negotiate at a Family Relationship Centre before approaching the Family Court, unless violence is an issue.

Dr McIntosh divided warring parents into two groups: the "child-focused" group, which received generic information about how conflict can damage children; and a "child inclusive" group, in which parents were given drawings and writing by their own children on how the collapsing marriage was affecting them.

The process had to be handled delicately, and by experts. "It's not just a case of sitting down with children and saying, so, how do you feel about Mum and Dad getting a divorce?" Dr McIntosh said. "That would be a terrible over-simplification."

But the result was clear: parents who were told exactly how their squabbling was affecting the children "quickly modified their behaviour".

"If you say to parents, 'Your conflict hurts children', that's one thing. But if you say to them, 'This is what your child is actually saying', that's a different thing," Dr McIntosh said.

"The level of conflict dropped dramatically. Parents seemed to get a wake-up call. They were moved by the things they heard from their children."

Fathers were more likely to see a parenting arrangement as "fair" after seeing the impact of conflict on their children.

It is not yet clear whether the "child inclusive" model will be adopted by the Family Relationship Centres. While it seems effective, it is also expensive.

But Dr McIntosh said the process "certainly encourages parents to think like adults," which is one of the things Mr Ruddock has been trying to achieve.

"It can help them push the domino over in the right direction, and while there is pain, grief, upset, they need to keep their eye on the ball, which is the children."

She said the "executive functioning" kicks in, "where they say, 'That's right, I have children who are dependent upon me' ".

"It seems to allow both parents to swallow the bitter pill."

© The Australian